Friday, March 2, 2012

The Bald and the Handsome


In GOD, I used to watch THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL


... I am not trying to be spiritual here..Don't imagine myself meditating on the form of god or something else..

I actually meant In Good Old Days, I used to watch The bold and the beautiful which used to be telecasted in Star World which used to host many other good shows.. ( ;P). Little did I know then that I will be writing a post about it. Everyone in this world aspires to be bold and also beautiful err. in case of Men, they want to be primarily handsome..



Once you are born into this world, you have a cute face which is liked by one and all. You are kissed on your cheeks, no matter which gender is kissing you. You gurgle and make sounds which make all wonder about the child in you.. 


Wow.. what innocence and credulousness.. and all sorts of happy expressions and "cho chweet", "cho cute" perceptions spring out of people who see you when you are a child, like a baby, who keeps licking whatever comes into hand.


( The following is applicable for co-ed school-going boys)
Once you reach school,  say you are in some 7th standard. You are late to class one day. So the teacher holds you by your hair and smashes your face with good sounding slaps. 


You reach your seat without any sensation to those slaps as if its like another usual event like getting up from bed to brush your teeth. As you reach your seat, some girl who is a first ranker turns back from her first row bench and gives looks to you showing some sense of pity. You immediately brush your hair frantically searching for your comb in vain. And you comb your hair with natural fingers imagining some rajnikanth is styling his hair. 


( The following is applicable for co-ed college-going guys)
Once you reach college, say you are in some sophomore year.. You walk up to college one fine morning. Your gang is waiting for your late arrival as usual. You put stand for your bike and you just turn around to reach your gang. Suddenly something strikes like a thunderbolt. (courtesy: GodFather). It strikes so hard. You lose sense of the world. You lose sense of your gang standing and waiting for the past one hour for you. The gang is waiting just few metres away. Your eyes automatically follow someone. You just wish that she turns and looks at you. Immediately, she for no reason turns back, walks in your direction. Your blood is pumped at an alarming rate. You tend to worry. You get scared for no reason. You become tensed. Your hand automatically reaches your hair and adjusts the grass which has grown for the past 19 years of your life. The grass which has been cut, cut, and cut, yet grows tall and tall... You concentrate on your hair for some time.. and she passes by you.. You notice that she forgot her notebook on her cycle.. It was not for you.. It was for her notebook that she turned bey... Yet you comb your hair and groom yourself  daily. You buy all the utilities necessary to make you handsome, as if you are some Ajith and some shalini is there looking at you daily...


(The following is applicable not for all.. )
Once you reach the workplace. You now are in a state where you are done with your studies.. all the mugging and bucketing days are over... All nightouts and midnight butter-maggi sessions are over.. Now the only thing is you have a dumb terminal, formal wear, sometimes casual wear..
One fine morning, you get up and as usual search for the tooth brush..
And you realise after looking at the mirror, that you don't need a comb at all from that day..
Its not that you went to tirupathi and did some mottai-thing. 
Your hair naturally escaped from your head. It was like shawshank redemption hero who silently escaped from the prison. Only few prisoners are left on your head. And you funnily imagine, how did rajni feel like when he played the mottai boss role in Shivaji the Boss.. 


You imagine yourself hitting your head like how mottai boss does to his head.. You suddenly come to reality of  life.. You hear that "tap tap tap" sound really. You are scared.. You again slightly tap your head.. again "tap tap tap" sound from your head. Oh my Gosh, I have really turned BALD. This day was really far away from the day I starting watching The bold and the beautiful.



You start imaging all worse things.. like: You go to your sisters home. Your nephew and niece start playing tabla on your head. They start telling, "Amma, this seems to be an ideal surface for hitting and learning tabla..Your niece is damn creative and she starts using permanent marker and starts drawing tabla marks.
Your neice starts saying: "Inner circle drawing overru.. Now outer circleuu..amma.. "


 Dei dei.. come to reality.. Look at the phrase: The Bald and the handsome. You have turned bald. Its fine. Now its ur duty to become handsome.. Look at Andre Agassi..Take some inspiration. Dont look at Sanjay dutt in Agneepath. Your head will be on fire then..Look at Steve Jobs.. Oh.. Dont worry you don't have turtleneck t-shirts. Normal Lacoste t-shirts are more than enough. 


How I wish, Our heads were like Microsoft Word document. And all the characters in the document are like the thin strands on our head. Wishing some "BALD" button in Microsoft Word was there. And I would just unselect it.. Immediately from nowhere, million strands will spring out on my head. And I would select Italics for some diff styling of hair. I dont want Underlining though.(left to your imagination.. ). And I could increase font size depending on the occasion. When I am with my party friends, I would increase the font size. When I reach home, I would select the default font size and say, " Hi uncle" as I greet my relatives at my home. And when I go to some no man's land, I would select different fonts: My strangest wish is "WingDings font" It would make my hair awesome with all sorts of design. Great to imagine all this.. I am still bold , why? Because I have to work on the second part of "The Bald and the ...."...


Please note: "You and I are used interchangeably in the above sentences..